Today we’d like to introduce you to Monique Joseph.
Hi Monique, we’d love for you to start by introducing yourself.
I’m a Houston native from a long line of strong and God fearing Deboses, Fords, Keetons, and Sigurs. My mother and her five siblings were raised in the Sunnyside neighborhood of Houston. My father was raised in Alexandria, LA—a proud fact I often mention before saying this next part. My parents raised my brother and I on the Northside of Houston, and I graduated in 2006 from Klein Forest High School. Later, I attended Moody Bible Institute in Chicago, hoping to be a women’s minister. While in bible college, I met my ex-husband and the father of our three children. We eventually moved to Houston, where we got married and started to settle into being adults and parents. In 2016, Harris County railroaded him and wrongfully sentenced him to 45 years in prison at a probation hearing. Having the father of my children suddenly taken from the household, along with the fact that Texas uses 3rd-grade reading levels to predict future prison beds, completely changed my goals in life. I left my career in the medical field to join the local fight to end mass incarceration. I knew that I had to do all I could to ensure my children could not be victimized by Harris County’s legal system any further. I want my children to say, “My momma fought for and believed mass incarceration would end”. Now I find myself serving in grassroots coalitions, on the board of a Christian non-profit, working in community engagement at UH, finishing my Master’s, and raising three beautiful children in one of the most systemically racist states in the US. And still I rise!
Alright, so let’s dig a little deeper into the story – has it been an easy path overall and if not, what were the challenges you’ve had to overcome?
This life of mine has been full of obstacles and trials, but I can say that I have a testimony of how God kept and blessed me through each of them. My mother is now married to a woman and growing up, her lifestyle was shunned by my peers and the church community that I belonged to. I remember the mothers of my female friends being reluctant about sleepovers as if being a lesbian was an airborne condition. The love I’ve grown for my brothers and sisters in the struggle comes from the love I know continues to keep my mother when the world told her she was nothing but a sinner.
While some may envy my tiny physique, the constant challenges to my dignity are ever-present. I’m a small woman, but God has allowed me to encounter giant obstacles that have limited my fear and expanded my capacity for grace.
The obvious struggle was the wrongful conviction of my ex-husband and the father of our three beautiful children. I’ve recently learned about ambiguous grief and disenfranchised loss. Please take time and explore the two topics as they relate to children with incarcerated parents. Gregory Gomez is studying these topics with the Lucine Center, and I’ll tell you this: the world has no idea how to care for and love my children, nor any other child with an incarcerated parent. Some church folks want to know if he “deserved it”, the system folks think “scared straight” is the best option, and the schools are effectively funneling children to TDCJ. The fight for my children, and all children, is ever-present. The battle for trauma-informed care, restorative practices, and the elimination of racist polices in their schools is an ongoing obstacle. Ending mass incarceration may seem impossible to some, but just keep thinking that. God, being rich in mercy, hears the prayers of children separated from their parents and always shows up when everyone thinks He won’t.
As you know, we’re big fans of you and your work. For our readers who might not be as familiar what can you tell them about what you do?
Once you get past the “some people need jail” mindset, you start to imagine what society would look like embracing restorative justice, opposed to punitive punishment. The harm my family endured from the state-sanctioned family separation made me evaluate how we could address harm without creating more of it. Trying to convince folks that a Black man was innocent was nearly impossible, so the work of dealing with folks EVERYONE else thinks is guilty became the goal.
Healing Circles have been my passion since I experienced one with the Texas Organizing Project in 2018. These are spaces where folks come together and share their thoughts, feelings, and experiences related to a topic—a much-needed space for the everyday person. At work, we are told to leave our personal lives at home, and at home, we try our best to leave work drama in the office. In our neighborhood, if we have an issue with a neighbor, we call the police (militarized force) to help us handle the beef. When that beef hits the courts, we can’t be honest because “what you say CAN and WILL be used against you in the court of law”. There is no assumption of the best intentions; instead, we want retribution, not to assume the best, to listen to the situation, and to create a path forward. No, it’s punishment for that person, harm them as they harmed me. Well, guess what? No human heals by harming other humans. They are lying to you. Watching the suffering of others, even when they have harmed you, eventually creates a hardened heart or desensitization. Healing Circles offer space for all to speak their truth, claim their faults, be reminded of their value, and develop paths towards healing.
There is a Zulu tribe that I learned about years ago. When a community member commits some harm, that person is brought to a meeting with all the people from the tribe. The person who caused the harm is put in the middle of the circle, and all the tribe members take turns speaking and reminding them of all the best things they have done. Most people are now laughing like, “That’ll never happen,” just like folks said during segregation, lynching, black codes, and even before slavery reshaped. Don’t get me wrong, all of these still exist; it’s the understanding that at any moment with God, we have the collective power to stop it. That fills my tank!
How do you define success?
I love this question. Most would say Donald Trump, White Supremist, and all the other forms of evil are successful and winning, right now. They have cut support for those who need it and filled their own pockets and bellies. They travel, own material things, and don’t worry about bills or income. However, is gaining wealth on the backs of the vulnerable really winning?? Is having a lack of empathy for a whole group of people because of the color of their skin really an evolved mind??
Knowing that Black people are the original people and that diversity makes all reach their full potential. I argue that success is living a life that honors God and your community. Too many folks claim success, but their hearts are rotten, and they will step on and over anyone to be right, have power, or win.
Success is embodying integrity, honor, loyalty, grace, and mercy!
Image Credits
one photo by Patrick Mitchell
